Evil Dead Rise Maliciously Murders the Light and Joy in My Soul and I HATE IT…Though It’s Brilliant All the Same

Kalie and I saw Evil Dead Rise last night.  She was torn between seeing Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 and Evil Dead Rise, though she felt Evil Dead Rise would leave theatres first so it should be prioritized.  As I had already seen Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 twice, I didn’t argue.  I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE WRONG NOR REGRETTED A CHOICE AT THE MOVIES MORE COMPLETELY.  I hated Evil Dead Rise.  I HATED IT.  I thought it was horrible.  Now, I don’t mean I thought it was horrifying, as horror films strive to be.  No, it was horrible.  The more I thought about the visceral hatred it moved in me, the more I realized something…Evil Dead Rise has to be a brilliant film.  I wasn’t bored.  I wasn’t apathetic toward it.  I HATED IT and I can’t tell you the last time I had such a seething reaction to a film.  So while the movie isn’t “for me” I can’t deny it’s a remarkably well made film and that – my deeply visceral reaction to a brilliant film I hated in the core of my being – felt like something worth exploring.

SPOILERS for Evil Dead Rise’s basic plot outline alone will follow.

Anchorman Revisited: A Stream of Consciousness Reflection

I’ve always loved the movies.  One of the greatest freedoms I gained with my driver’s license was being able to go to the movies whenever I wanted.  Long before smartphones let us check showtimes online, I always had the week’s movie listings in my wallet, torn from the paper, so I knew what was playing when.  Multiple viewings were the norm.  During the free time-filled adulthood your early twenties bring, it wasn’t uncommon for me to see a movie I really loved six, seven, or even eight times in the theatre.  Then the count really went up once I had it on DVD!  I’ve had this idea for a new series for ages, to go back and rewatch the movies I loved most during my young adulthood and see how they feel now.  This isn’t an analysis but an off the cuff stream of consciousness journey.  What holds up?  What makes me nostalgic?  And what feels a bit cringy and uncomfortable now?  While I considered many films to kick off this series, there was really only ever one choice.  Released on 9 July 2004, I had just turned twenty-two when Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy hit theatres and it was love at first viewing.

Why M3GAN is a Better Parent than The Mandalorian

Okay, as pieces go, I grant this may be divisive.  And I grant I may be jumping into hot water when making the claim that Din Djarin, the titular Mandalorian from the Disney+ Star Wars series The Mandalorian, isn’t the most perfect father to Grogu, our li’l “Baby Yoda,” arguably the most adorable character in the Star Wars universe.  And I grant to suggest M3GAN, the A.I. doll-cum-murder-bot from Universal Pictures’ surprise hit horror/comedy/dance film M3GAN, is a better parent to Cady than Din Djarin is to Grogu may be turning the temperature of our metaphorical water up to a scalding, life-threatening degree.  But I’m not suggesting anything.  I’M SAYING IT.  M3GAN the A.I. doll-cum-murder-bot is by far a better parent to Cady than Din Djarin the Mandalorian is to Grogu.  BOOM.  I will die on this hill.  But before the internet moves to crucify me (oh! that worked really well with the “die on this hill” line!), hear me out and let me know what you think.  Okay?  Okay.  

Fair warning, SPOILERS for both M3GAN and The Mandalorian S1-3 will abound.

How to Build a TARDIS: A DIY Project When Dad Does Everything

Let’s not bury the lead here.  Having my own TARDIS is fantastic!  Modelled on the TARDIS used by the Ninth and Tenth Doctor (as far as the size and TARDIS exterior goes), it stands 8’ tall (without the lamp, more on that below) and it’s 48 ¼” wide at the base.  I’d say having my own TARDIS is every bit as exciting as I thought it would be except I never could have imagined loving it this much.  I mean, I have a TARDIS.  I.  Have.  A.  TARDIS!  I have a TARDIS!  How could I ever prepare for this sort of excitement??  The TARIDS was completed on Christmas Day (poeticly perfect timing) and we moved it into my classroom over Christmas break.  However, I’ve waited until now to tell this story as this is my 500^th post on My Comic Relief which warranted a special piece.  And what could be more special than having a TARDIS?!!?

Nearly seven years, 500 posts, and 1,258,447 words have led to this – the story of my TARDIS.   

Childhood Fears I Prepared For…Which Ended Up Never Factoring Into Adulthood

New Year’s Eve tends to bring nostalgic reflections and hopeful projections.  Tonight, no matter how hard the year’s been, it seems we always find some warm, nostalgic feels for what’s come before.  And no matter how hard life may feel in this moment, it seems we always find some excitement for what lays ahead.  If our last year was more beautiful and joyful than not, well all’s the easier to touch those bright reflections and projections.  I’m not sure why.  If I was to hazard a guess (which I feel I should as I brought all this up), I’d say it’s because – deep down – we are fundamentally hopeful.  We want to find reasons to celebrate, to believe.  New Year’s Eve is as good a reason as any!  While I’ve never been one to buy into the magic of tonight and the promise of tomorrow too much, I do enjoy a reason to be nostalgic and hopeful as much as the next person :).  So, in the spirit of the night, I figured it would be fun to get way nostalgic and look back at a few childhood fears I spent ages preparing for, only to find they were problems I’d never encounter in adulthood (well, at least not yet).

Brian Asman’s Man, Fuck This House – When I’d Move Out of This Haunted House

It’s almost Halloweeeeeeeeeen!  That means it’s time once again to look at the age-old question of the haunted house genre – Why don’t they just move?  Sure, sometimes you’re snowed in at the Overlook and there’s no conceivable way to get out but most times, if I was in the protagonist’s shoes, I’d just up and move.  I don’t care if I was in debt and didn’t have the money or means to sell and buy again.  That’s what bankruptcy’s for!  Getting away from ghosts!  In fact, imagining when I’d move and the alternate story it would lead to as I watch/read a scary haunted house story is one of my horror coping mechanisms.  So, in honor of Halloween and all things scary and spooky, haunted and horrific, macabre and malevolent, I’m doing a li’l series about this.  In each installment I consider a haunted house novel and ruminate on when, if I were living within the events of the novel, I’d move the heck outta that house.  This time I’m looking at Brian Asman’s Man, Fuck This House which gets my vote for “Best. Title. EVER.” and the equally prestigious “I’ve Never Felt A Title More” award. 

This piece contains minor spoilers for certain incidents in the novel but the ending and all major twists are left out of the discussion.  So read on based on your comfort with such spoiler territory ;D.

Ania Ahlborn’s Within These Walls – When I’d Move Out of This Haunted House

It’s time once again to look at the age-old question of the haunted house genre – Why don’t they just move?  Sure, sometimes you’re snowed in at the Overlook and there’s no conceivable way to get out but most times, if I was in the protagonist’s shoes, I’d just up and move.  I don’t care if I was in debt and didn’t have the money or means to sell and buy again.  That’s what bankruptcy’s for!  Getting away from ghosts!  In fact, imagining when I’d move and the alternate story it would lead to as I watch/read a scary haunted house story is one of my horror coping mechanisms.  So, in honor of Halloween and all things scary and spooky, haunted and horrific, macabre and malevolent, I’m doing a li’l series about this.  In each installment I consider a haunted house novel and ruminate on when, if I were living within the events of the novel, I’d move the heck outta that house.  This time I’m looking at Ania Ahlborn’s Within These Walls which managed to freak me out in two horrible, particularly unfair ways! 

This piece contains minor spoilers for certain incidents in the novel but the ending and all major twists are left out of the discussion.  So read on based on your comfort with such spoiler territory ;D.

Jac Jemc’s The Grip Of It – When I’d Move Out of This Haunted House

It’s the age-old question of the haunted house genre, isn’t it?  Why wouldn’t they just move?  It crosses my mind with every haunted house movie I watch or novel I read.  Sure, sometimes you’re snowed in at the Overlook and there’s no conceivable way to get out but most times, if I was in the protagonist’s shoes, I’d just up and move.  I don’t care if I was financially in debt and didn’t have the money or means to sell and buy again.  That’s what bankruptcy’s for!  Getting away from ghosts!  In fact, imagining when I’d move and the alternate story it would lead to as I watch/read a scary haunted house story is one of my horror coping mechanisms.  So I thought, in honor of Halloween and all things scary and spooky, haunted and horrific, macabre and malevolent, I’d write a li’l series about this.  I’d read haunted house novels and ruminate on when, if I were living within the events of the novel, I’d move the heck out of that house.  First up, is Jac Jemc’s The Grip Of It which is simultaneously the best and the scariest haunted house story I’ve ever read!

This piece contains minor spoilers for certain incidents in the novel but the ending and all major twists are left out of the discussion.  So read on based on your comfort with such spoiler territory ;D.

No, I Haven’t Seen That Show Yet. Here’s Why.

I’ve often heard it said we’re living in the era of Prestige Television (or Peak Television, if you prefer).  Regardless of the terminology, there is the general sense among people who think, write, and talk about these things that the 21^st century has seen the rise of a Golden Age – if not The Golden Age – of Television.  The caliber of what’s being offered on TV is generally considered to have risen.  There are more “high quality” shows generating more critical acclaim than ever before.  The line between “TV star” and the once-more prestigious “movie star” is blurring.  In fact, these TV shows with shorter seasons, renown casts, and complex storytelling, are often touted as six (or ten (or thirteen)) hour movies, broken up into smaller installments.  You couple this with the rise of streaming services (and the accompanying “streaming wars” where each service tries to outperform the others to earn your subscription fee) alongside the culture of binge-watching and our experience of television’s been transformed.  It is a remarkable time to be consuming such content and the excited query, “Have you seen [fill-in-the-blank-show] yet??” drives our pop culture conversations like never before.

The thing is, my answer is almost always “no.”  Like 9/10 times it’s “no.”  And here’s why.

Things I’m Thankful for in Quarantine

Those of you paying close attention may’ve noticed I’ve had a lot of wonderful content on the blog over the last month but all I’ve written was my loving ode to the Doctor.  That’s because I teamed up with a bunch of other marvelous bloggers to celebrate female characters through the month of March and I totally used that as the path to brilliant pieces I didn’t have to write.  It was awesome.  Those of you paying close attention may’ve also noticed the coronavirus has become a full-blown pandemic, a global crisis unlike anything I’ve ever seen in my lifetime, leading to quarantines and self-isolating and social distancing the world over.  That’s, admittedly, far less awesome.  However, I thought it’d be nice to celebrate some things I’ve been thankful for while stuck in self-isolation.