Okay, alright, yes…to pick any one Star Wars quote as my all time favorite is pretty much impossible. There are SO MANY brilliant lines to choose from and SO MANY have become a regular part of my life. Any fan can tell you there are several Star Wars quotes to fit any occasion. But Jenmarie clearly gets this and that’s why this month’s ComLINKS prompt asks, “If you were to pick one favorite quote, which would it be and why?” Did you see that “one” in there? I can pick one favorite quote, easy. And, just like last month, I didn’t even hesitate in my choice. I immediately knew what I’d write about. So what’s my favorite Star Wars quote? Drum roll please….

Padmé, Artoo, and Anakin are off on their (romantic?!?) adventure! / Photo Credit – Attack Of The Clones
My favorite quote comes care of Attack Of The Clones. After Obi-Wan and Anakin fail to learn the identity of the assassin who made an attempt on Padmé’s life, the Jedi Council encourages her to go into hiding. With Anakin as her protector (and Artoo along for the ride, third wheeling it), they leave Coruscant for Naboo and retreat to the countryside to lay low. As Padmé and Anakin stroll through the beautiful grounds of the country home where they’ll be staying, they come to a balcony overlooking a lake. Padmé tells Anakin about how, as children, she and her friends used to swim out to the island and lay on the sand as the sun dried them. Anakin’s reply is one of my all-time favorite Star Wars quotes. He tells her, “I don’t like sand. It’s coarse and rough and irritating. And it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft. And smooth…” It’s such a great line!!! Here’s the scene in all its awkward glory:
Now, before we go any further I need to be clear about something. You may be wondering if I’m being serious here. I can assure you, I am. I’m not being funny or ironic of snarky or anything like that. I legitimately love this line. With that in mind, dear reader, you may be asking…why?? I grant it’s an unexpected if not outright odd choice. Of all the Star Wars films, Attack Of The Clones is probably maligned the most. And of all the lines in Attack Of The Clones, this one is constantly made fun of for being awkward and cheesy and ridiculous. But I love it anyway! In fact, it’s because of and not in spite of this cheese and awkwardness that I love it so much.
I grant I have a tall order ahead of me but let’s see if I can legitimately make the case for why “I don’t like sand. It’s coarse and rough and irritating. And it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft. And smooth…” is one of my all time favorite Star Wars quotes.

Even after that line, they go for the kiss! / Photo Credit – Attack Of The Clones
First, it’s funny. I mean it just is. Listen to it! Poor Hayden Christensen delivers this excellent line (bear with me) perfectly (bear with me again) and he’ll probably be haunted by it for the rest of his career. But it’s great. You can’t deny it makes you chuckle when you hear it. And it makes you laugh because it’s so awkward and cheesy! So the awkward/cheese factor gets the line points here as it makes the line legitimately funny. Because of how funny and awkward it is, I find it incredibly memorable. As a result, I quote it all the time. Seriously, anytime I can find the opening (even if someone only remotely mentions something tangentially sand-related) I’ll say, “I don’t like sand. It’s coarse and rough and irritating. And it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft. And smooth…” Then, depending on who’s around me, I’ll reach out and awkwardly stroke the arm of someone nearby. I don’t know if it’s more uncomfortable for people who don’t recognize the line or for the ones who do and realize they’re living a super uncomfortable scene from Attack Of The Clones. Either way it’s perfect and I love this line so much, in part, because of that.

Just a couple of crazy kids, flirtin’ in a meadow. / Photo Credit – Attack Of The Clone
Second, it’s real. People like to criticize the acting and writing in Attack Of The Clones but I maintain this scene is spot on. In fact, I’d say this scene and this line is one of the most authentic pieces of acting you’ll find in any movie anywhere. (I said I’m not being ironic! Stop rolling your eyes! Again, bear with me.) Look, Anakin is nineteen years old and he’s hanging out with this girl he’s had a crush on for ten years. Put yourself back in that spot. Remember your high school crushes? Remember that nervous anxiety, wondering if they like you too? Remember what all that feels like with practically no dating and/or romantic experience? Well that’s where Anakin is. He likes her…it seems like she kinda likes him too (!!!)…and they’ve been slowly kicking up the intensity of their flirting during their time together. It is literally a dream come true for Anakin! And now they’re finally alone, in this unbelievably gorgeous location, with nothing to do but hang out together. So what do you do? You try and take it to the next level! Goodbye Friend Zone, hello Smooch City! Naturally you’re going to try to say something witty and clever and maybe even a little sexy too…..and it comes out as, “I don’t like sand. It’s coarse and rough and irritating. And it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft. And smooth…” AAAARRRGGGHHH!!!! I would argue this – saying something ridiculously lame in front of someone you really, really like when you’re desperately hoping they like you too – is a universal human experience. There’s nothing you can do but watch those words hover awkwardly between you. But wait…maybe there is more you can do. How about you try to stroke her arm? Perfect. Now your attempt at sexy, witty wooing has become a ridiculously awkward and clumsy mess!

“I can’t believe I just said that…I can’t believe I just said that…I can’t believe I just said that…Maybe I should stroke her arm.” / Photo Credit – Attack Of The Clones
This scene perfectly captures that moment! Everyone of us has been in that spot where we say something and then immediately wish we could take it back. I’m sure with minimal effort you can call to mind a personal example right now. Ugh…those are the words that force us to lay awake at night, replaying them in our minds wondering how we could have said something so stupid. So when I hear this cheesy line of dialogue, I think of that. The whole line and Hayden Christensen’s whole delivery perfectly captures the awkward attempt at trying to be cool in front of a person you like. But there’s another level of realness to this too.
Watching the scene, it doesn’t seem like Anakin is immediately embarrassed by what he said. (Maybe he is and he just hides it well.) This lack of embarrassment too is universal. We all say and do things when we’re younger that, when we look back on them as adults, make us think, “YIKES…how could I have EVER said/done/thought/wore/etc. THAT?!?!?” At the time, in the passion and inexperience of youth, it seems so cool or worldly or perfect. Then we grow up and realize it was soooooo awkward. I’d argue this too is a universal experience. And this scene perfectly captures that in a wonderfully awkward, perfectly uncomfortable line of dialogue!

They are so cute together! / Photo Credit – Attack Of The Clones
Third, it’s cute. I don’t care what you say, this is a cute line. Anakin likes Padmé and he has NO experience flirting (because, you know, Jedi) but he tries. He really likes her and this is his chance and it’s a forbidden love but he doesn’t care and he goes for it anyway…and it comes out, “I don’t like sand. It’s coarse and rough and irritating. And it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft. And smooth…” Then Padmé, who knows she shouldn’t give into this but likes Anakin anyway, lets it go like it isn’t awkward. There is NO WAY to deliver a line like that followed by a super uncomfortable and unsolicited arm rub without it being weird. But Padmé isn’t even phased. Why? How could she let something so cheesy go by without even a snicker? Well because something larger is going on here. Anakin likes her so he’s trying to flirt. And Padmé likes him too so she’s flirting back, even though he’s so awkward! So, just as Hayden Christensen plays his role of awkwardly flirting guy with a crush perfectly, so too does Natalie Portman play her part of flattered and smitten girl with a crush perfectly too.

Awww… and then they just GO FOR IT. Smooch City: Population 2! Yay! You go you two! / Photo Credit – Attack Of The Clones
Because of the super awkward cheese factor, not in spite of it, this scene and this line is brilliant. It makes us laugh and it’s a testament to the horrible trials of learning to flirt and date that everyone goes through. Lastly, it’s a perfect example of what you let go and/or what you find charming and endearing when you are falling for someone. Think of the last time you were around two people who were just falling head-over-heels in love with each other (and you weren’t one of the two). It’s kind of annoying (in a beautiful way!) right? They find everything about each other cute and funny and adorable. Well that’s exactly what’s happening between Anakin and Padmé in this moment. In fact, had their love been allowed to have a happier ending, this would have become a story they look back on and laugh about years later in their relationship. With a smile on their faces, thinking about their goofy, awkward youth in love that was ridiculous to everyone but them, they’d sigh and said, “Do you remember when…?”
So yes, “I don’t like sand. It’s coarse and rough and irritating. And it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft. And smooth…” IS one of my all-time favorite Star Wars quotes. Yes it’s awkward. Yes it’s cheesy. And I love it all the same.

Aww, they truly, deeply love each other! It’s beautiful. / Photo Credit – Attack Of The Clones
You’ll regret this post in 10 years.
*facepalm* I can’t. Really? You chose that line? I read your whole post and your arguments and you didn’t win me over. All I can think of is…really? (Complete with a look of total bafflement at the computer screen right now)
In 10 years, maybe even 10 minutes, you’ll think back and say, “Wait, what about all those OTHER AMAZING LINES in SIX OTHER MOVIES?”
Okay, I’m trying not to be that incredulous. I am though, I am.
But I still love you and your posts and will keep reading them.
Over and out. MTFBWY. (Oh wait, that’s a truly iconic line from a truly iconic set of movies….)
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Listen, I’ve loved the line for fifteen years at this point and, honestly, I love it more each time I watch it. Does it make me cringe? You bet! But, as I said above, I love it because of that! In fact, thinking out the argument for this post has taken me to a new height of love for this line.
I appreciate that you still love me and will continue to read my posts anyway, even if I couldn’t win you over :). I will say this though, should you end up being right and I come to ultimately regret this choice/post (even though I can’t ever see that happening…), I’ll owe you an Auntie Anne’s hot pretzel along with your “I told you so.”
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You worked SO hard to sell this quote! I commend you for your effort. But what I am truly amazed at is that you go around saying the quote to people and then reaching out to stroke their arm. Creeper alert! Damn, I laughed so hard imanging you doing that to some unsuspecting person.
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Hahaha, yep, it’s pretty hilarious. You have to be ready to sell it though; you can’t crack and laugh when you do it. Sometimes I just do the sand part and not the “smooth” conclusion (which, irony alert, when he does that he isn’t being smooth at all!!!) but, admittedly, that loses some of the awkward magic.
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Once I saw the picture on this post I knew which line you’d pick. You win the internet today my friend…you win!
You at least made my day anyways.
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YAY!!! I don’t know if I’m more excited that I made your day or that you were able to guess the quote from the featured image. Either way, let’s hear it for appreciating awkwardness :).
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awkwardness is all I have…its my swagger…or more like anti-swagger. Do the kids still say swagger…ugh
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“The Awkward Swaggerer” would be a GREAT name for a Western comedy about a cowboy who was always soooo close to being as cool as the other cowboys but then fell short (WOW…my head’s in a weird place today). Anyway, regardless of what the kids are sayin’, I’m with you. Awkwardness for the win!
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Don’t encourage him, Rob. He will just feed off of this and keep posting absolute nonsense. Next thing he will do is tell us Watto is his favorite character and that he has a crush on Sy Snootles.
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LET ME FEEL MY FEELINGS JEFF! Also, if you were here, I’d give you an awkward arm rub to help underscore the point.
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Now I’ll give you the liking Watto being complete nonsense. But Sy Snootles is very crush worthy….look at that snout AND those lips…damn girl!!
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Hahaha – I love this!! This just made my day :).
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I’m glad =)
Not that great for me though, my heart is racing, I’m sweaty, and I NEED to go home and watch Return of the Jedi…ALONE
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I keep laughing out loud when I read these!!! Is it weird that I kind of want you to write an occasional series on “Unexpected Star Wars Crushes” you talk about how cute various aliens are who inhabit the Star Wars background scenes? (Okay, like I said in the other comment, I am in a WEIRD head place today!) Still, I think it could be a really funny series. Oh! Or it could be a numbered post! Like a “Ten Unexpected Star Wars Crushes” or something like that.
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Why should I stop at Star Wars? Have you seen some of the hotties in a D&D monster manual? I’ll start working on it!!!!
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OH MY GOSH YES!!!! There is near limitless entertainment possibility here! Monday has officially become the best day of the week this week as it’s seen this idea born. This is going to be so much fun and so funny too. WOO!
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I can’t wait to get started. At the moment I’m working on some of the 20 saved drafts I have accumulated but never finished. Make this 21 =)
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If the intention of this scene – with the delivery of this line – was to capture the awkward nature of Anakin’s feelings towards Padme, then it does that perfectly. What I don’t get about the scene is how the line, and Anakin’s entire demeanor, actually lead to him and Padme kissing. The awkwardness is believable, but the kiss doesn’t seem to fit. But, then again, Padme ends up admitting she loves Anakin AFTER he is all like “I killed women and children” soooooo maybe she is just not as emotionally strong as we make her out to be?
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I think it’s because she loves (or at least likes him for your former point). If we didn’t excuse the awkward gaffs of the people we liked while we were getting to know them, there’d be far fewer couples around. So I maintain that part’s super cute, how she still kisses him. As to the latter point, I think we can love people in their brokenness and, I think that’s what happens. When she sees him after the murder of the Tusken Raiders, she sees him as a broken child-becoming-a-man, in part, maybe because she didn’t see the slaughter. Even after he kills the younglings she still tries to bring him back.
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I say your favourite quote everytime someone asks me if I want to go to the beach!! Well, except the last part… that would be a little too much.
I prefer the English version… in Spanish Anakin sounds like a snob.
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First, I’ve never heard it in Spanish but now you have me VERY intrigued! Second, YAY!!! I love that you a) love this quote too and b) USE this quote too! Aaaaahh…the beauty of a shared quote enthusiasm :).
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In Spanish is:
“No me gusta la arena. Es áspera, tosca e irritante; y se mete por doquier”
That “por doquier” is not really used. Unless you are a know-it-all. Anakin in Spanish is a bit pedant…
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I love this! I had no idea about the Spanish translation or its implications. And now I’ve learned something exciting! (I’m a huge nerd but I mean it – this is so cool.) Thank you for explaining this!
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Hola Michael,
Great job snagging a moment. There are layers that people miss in the entirety of a whole movie. When I do a music and sound lesson in my video class I love the hammer scene for Age of Ultron. One squeak moves a moment, just like this one. Hope you find more moving moments to motivate your ideas.
Thanks, Gary
On Tue, Nov 21, 2017 at 2:57 PM, My Comic Relief wrote:
> Michael J. Miller posted: “Okay, alright, yes…to pick any one Star Wars > quote as my all time favorite is pretty much impossible. There are SO MANY > brilliant lines to choose from and SO MANY have become a regular part of my > life. Any fan can tell you there are several Star Wars ” >
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Okay, I was laughing but also fairly convinced by your argument. You actually made one of the worse lines ever written make a lot of sense under the context that you presented. Awkward, in love–makes sense. I once accidentally flirted so poorly that it made it sound like I knew where the guy lived (who I had just met), so, been there.
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Aaaahh! I love that my argument convinced you! Sweet! Also, I’m happy that you’re able to empathize with awkwardness in love too. It’s a wonderfully embarassing thing that unites us all :).
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“You wanna buy some death-sticks?”
“You don’t want to sell me death sticks.”
“Ah, I don’t want to sell you death sticks.”
“You want to go home and rethink your life.”
“I want to go home and rethink my life.” 😉
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Ahahahahahaha! Absolutely perfect! This just made my day :).
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Well, you may have convinced me. But how do we know this was an intentional commentary on the awkwardness of teenage love? And not just some cringe-worthy writing? 😉
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Listen Krysta…I have NO WAY to counter this and it successfully undercuts my entire argument. BUT I shall stand by my love of this line nonetheless! Because even if it was cringe-worthy writing it still ended up being a spot-on depiction of teenage love so it all worked out in the end. Right? I mean that KIND OF answers it…maybe? Right? Yeah, I’ll count it as a win :).
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I’m not sure it really undercuts your argument. As you say, even if the screenwriters didn’t intend this depth, that doesn’t mean it isn’t arguably there! 😀 I just couldn’t help but poke a little fun at the scene. 😉
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Hahaha, it’s certainly a scene that’s good for that. As I said above, on more than one occasion I’ve used the quote live, in person, and it always throws people/makes them really uncomfortable. It wouldn’t work if not for the ridiculousness!
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